Read In Your Language

Friday, January 8, 2010


niggas need them a backbone.

yesterday, on Bol's post on, a discussion erupted. his post was about the black woman complainin about Reggie Bush bein on the cover of Essence cause he was wit Kim Kardashian, who is not black. (but what is that nowadays? have they seen that ass?) me, of course, u know i went in.

but then a female commenter, Mousie, came into the forum and commented and then the fellas all went into this apologetic, apathetic stance. some even optin to take back what they said (shame on you nicholasdelorejo), even after Mousie made such a blatantly uninformed statement that said that in the 60's and 70's black men "decided" (all at once, i suppose) to not take care of their kids. she ends her comment with "Fuck yall niggas" from Jay-z's "Takeover". me, of course, i asked her if i gots to be her nigga, why can't she be my bitch? i'm hopeful to get a comment from her today.

me, i cant speak for all yall, but i've had enough of doin the same thing over and over. i'm not makin excuses for nobody. not for me and definitely not for u. a pause for the reality of the situation: we all are sufferering from a mass form of abuse. the psyche of people of color has been terribly scarred by the force of slavery, imperialism and colonialism. me, im Indian and African, so i feel the pain twice as deep. so i dont wanna hear that whinin when u see my picture, see my hair and be like, "you're not Black!" i dont need to be to be oppressed. but for the sake of this discussion, my mother will make Sam Jackson look like a redbone. dont bother me with those tired ass skin color politics.

this mass abuse is just like a an abused child, or an abused animal (for my white folks). that abuse has long reaching effects, and will affect that person/ animal for years, until some sort of treatment is given to first identify it and then to relieve the individual of the burden and mental blockage that causes and precipitates abnormal behavior. but then there is the subjective abuse that affects the individuals singularly from that pool of abuse we all spring from. in women we have this manifested in their direct relationship with or without their father. it really does scar the way they look at themselves and the way they deal with men. i know in my life i've felt a certain pressure to have a lot of women cause i'm pretty, peer pressure mostly. (i'll go into what affects the men in another post.) i've received comments over the years like "oh, i know u got a lot of kids". shit like that. so when u outgrow that and really start wantin to deal with quality over quantity, u get to this point in ur dealings with women where they start to want to make u prove urself over and over again, no matter how much u do for them. they want to take u thru tests and argue everything u say. some will even do things that sabotage the relationship itself, such as keep ties with other men. some start arguments and fights over the things they want that "u cant give them", which is really them tryin to reason a way out of the relationship. some just strait up fuck somebody else. cause in a lot of these chicks mind, if they own daddy couldn't love them, how is it possible that you can?

a queen is worthy of the title. and those not worthy, usually wear this crown by force. thats in principalities. in the realm of perspectives, u only have ur presentation and ur conduct to deserve that title. a lot of women want to be called queen just cause they black. beat it. even in the old kingdoms, every women wasnt no gotdam queen. somebody had to do the laundry, ya dig? you can be the queen of your household, but what do u do to deserve that title when traveling abroad? traveling dignitaries have motorcades and announcements proclaiming the arrival of a queen. if u aint got all that, all u have is the way u carry it, love. but thats ACTION. i need to see it. cause if u tell me u a queen and u sloppy, business aint handled right, fuck with anything less than a thorobred, i got a hearty "get the fuck outta here" for you on reserve.

then im sick of this tired ass rhetoric and bullshit reasoning. "we have to take back the way we're portrayed in the media". "the music has helped contribute to the low self esteem of women". get the fuck outta here!!! the music aint do shit! or the images either. i am a supporter of anything that will build wealth for poor people. if these girls can make a livin off of bein beautiful, baby, go get your money! its ok for white women to do it? you black women only say its wrong for BLACK women. you NEVER have the same criticism or white women. even if we are witnessing the total restructuring of the value of beauty in the favor of women of color, whereas nothing else was deemed valuable because of the prominence, the dominance of the image of the white woman. are u still too nearsighted to see a social revolution happening in front of you? one that is caused just by YOU being beautiful, black woman? but YOU would demonize and criticize the image of your own selves. and u don't see where thats a symptom of abuse?

and then the one about the music? are u serious? it may reinforce the images. it is not a source for them. any pimp will tell u that aint a ho hoin that aint already had years of abuse piled up on her until a pimp showed up to show her a better way. yes, a better way. cause a lot of these broads are out here fuckin without regard to life or injury caused by irresponsible behavior. a pimp will at least make sure shes tested, she uses condoms and stays safe, cause he has a vested interest in that bitch stayin healthy. a bitch thats runnin the streets with no to low self esteem doesnt care what happens to her. even if she catch them letters. see, the negative aint goin nowhere. GOD made the DEVIL. even he thought it was necessary for the negative to exist. and since god made evil, evil exists in the mind of god. therefore, how do you honestly think you gone eradicate it from this plane of reality? won't happen. so at least the negative can be managed. like a pimp does a ho. or like the street life used to have rules and regulations that prevented the acts of those in "the Life" to spill into the lives of the uninitiated. and as any pimp who seen some action will tell you, aint a pimp livin or dead ever turned out a ho better than they own mamma and daddy did.

women hate criticism. but so do a lot of these dudes. cause i mean, shit they was raised by women. its natural that they would take on some of these characteristics. why u think these niggas wearin girl jeans nowadays? see, i aint makin excuses for nobody. if u cant see urself, ill show u what i see. and i aint gonna hold back on it. cause these females have been spoiled to the point of a hard return. and they wanna be spoiled. but a spoiled child aint happy. they always cryin. cause they always want somethin else. thats just like u black women. and until u recognize that its there and fill that void, stop expectin me (us) to fill it for u.

so do somethin different. anything. instead of always complainin... 'specially 'bout the same ol' shit...


«Oldest   ‹Older   1 – 200 of 261   Newer›   Newest»

Avenger XL did not take anything back. Please tell me how this chick got me apologize. I still believe the problem has to do with lack of a black community and the media always showing the worse case scenario with blacks.

Example of media bias. I was watching the national championship game yesterday and they kept talking about bamas QB being a road scholar even though he is bland as a QB in my opinion. But the man who gave them the title and heisman MArk Ingrams academics are not mentioned. Just some touching story of how his daddy is in jail and now his single parent mama is sitting in the stands cheering him on. drapped in a red neck bear bryant hounds tooth paterned coat no less. DAMN!

@AvengerXL... ur right. my apologies, i was wrong. it was nicholasdelorejo that swallowed his own daggers. i'm gonna fix that right now.

u was one with the ones i referenced with the same ol' rhetoric.

u seem like an intelligent dude, i always like ur comments. but what about some original ideas? what about a new way to move forward? the old paradigm is...old.

but if dude dad was in jail and mom was there for self, then thats TODAY'S reality. what it 'should be' is OUR FAULT if it aint what it should be. i say if he and mom still got thru that abuse and turned a negative into a positive, good for them. it's gonna take personal action and responsibility to make this shit somethin different. not blame.

Avenger you're one the homies, but I agree w/Cult. Bring that to the forums man. Put them fresh thoughts out there.

"I still believe the problem has to do with lack of a black community"

The forums are OUR community. These same people who have been ignored are on the web now. Talk to them, they're talking to you.

mousie where you at? Let's build...

What do you mean something new? We have not even come close to building a true community and the net is not a community not even a true think tank. It is like a barbershop except people will be more insulting because they don't fear any harm. Around the world black is considered bad, so it would only make sense for the black disporia in the states to work harder to become a force to change these ideas. Part of which is championing what kind of cultural identity we want to except. As I keep saying the reason anyone gets married have changed over the years and that is not taken into consideration in this whole black women not married question. Also I don't see happily black married couples on television a lot or in writings. I have been married to the same black woman for 7 years and can't imagine life without her where is my voice in this discussion.

Also the reason I mentioned the way the Running back from Bama was described as a feel good story, while the QB is painted as a genuis. That is the only paradim the gate keepers allow us to see. So that does more to reinforce the foolish nature that we haven't truely address. Bottomline the things I said will become old when they are properly approached in the community. until then they are as new as when they where first mentioned.

Also the tired ides we need to end is the crazy tin foil conspiracy theories over the reality of self sustained pain.

thats what i'm talkin bout. real insight. because we dont know what things will develop into. this is just a start. we doin things over here. what is a "TRUE think tank"? like THEY do it?

i agree with most of what u said. but i can't help but notice u say these tin foil conspiracies, but the whole jist of ur previous comments is about what THEY portray us as. with no proof, it's a theory by definition. thats why i constantly preach the mantra of independent at all costs. nobody controls me. i dont even fuck with credit like that. that way, i dont have to worry about what THEY do.

i keep askin for the new approach, cuz if we keep sayin and doing the same thing with no result, thats what they call insanity. so thats what i mean by that same ol' rhetoric. it aint workin! so i'm not crazy, thats why i keep wantin to hear and see somethin different. not just from the women. but from all of us.

i hope i aint offend u. that wasn't my intent. but i only talk sweet to women. but good stuff, hope u keep comin thru!

So if the 'net is not a true think tank why do we come together and think and discuss topics? Share ideas, music, experiences? Isn't that what communities do?

As for the tin foil statement, if it was that easy for anyone to overcome and be successful, why are so many people without? People don't want to be poor by choice. Some just don't have a plan or become frustrated of hitting the same brick wall constantly so they give up.

Look at Tyler Perry. He has every opportunity to do another Good Times or The Jeffersons or a Claudia. Why doesn't he? But our society calls Spike a hater. I saw the game. I know exactly what you're saying. Don't they always want the next Golden Boy?

Anyway your example of wedded bliss would have been a good talk over at the X-spot. That's doing something different. There are plenty of us who aren't living the black stigma. We need to tell these stories.

I always tell dudes that there are cats who are watching, coming specifically to XXL to read what we say. Dudes who are really trying and perhaps don't have that person around to speak to. I think this is a good look.

I say most of the internet message board discussions is like a loose casual debate amoung strangers and friends. Where as think tanks are given specific problems to come up with solutions and outcomes for that can be implemented. Can can a think tank be created online? Yes all the time I am in a African letter fraternity that places together some of the better community minds to bring proposals to the city council in my state and we use google wave(BAM THINK TANK). Message board discussions are like drawing boards or sketch pads. Great things can come out of them but a think tank has a lot more direction.

Secondly It is a known fact that western media has always created stereotypes of minority groups which reinforced the racism and xenophopia that was pushed into society by the powerbrokers of the time. Go to youtube and look up racist cartoons or How the sassy black woman and the thuggin black guy is over portrayed. Even though those architypes exist where are more of the learned black people or every day black people. Who are typical Americans but just happen to be black. That is not a conspiracy that is right there in your face. Now getting into the why things are this way is usually what causes the conspiracy flags. Because if you were to corner hollywood or a record label about negative stereotypes they would hit you with a series of test numbers that sell ads and keep it moving. So you could say it is a C.O.N. spiracy by the man aka the whiteshadow to keep a brother down or you could say that humanity is tribal and xenaphobic by nature and when given an oppurtunity creates a class of otherness which is often lower than their tribe. Both of these may be correct but you can only prove the xenaphopia. Anyhoo B-Boy cult I am not upset and I am enjoying the discusion. I will hit your site more often.


Good shit, gentlemen.

Nothing like enjoying a day, watching a good chess game...

Avenger do you see that I am asking you the questions so you can answer them? It is my way of getting you to bring that intel to the table. Share!


*Late pass*

So you were asking me if I'd checked your site because you spoke on it here. Got it. I'm not on the net that much.

I don't believe that any of those men were apologizing, I believe the conversation turned into something more thoughtful, which at the end of the day, made it worth speaking on. I could not speak for all Black Women, but there are a lot of differences in us. I did not think that the men on there truly felt that way, I've not seen them generalize in that way. If they do, glad to know it. At the same time, I get what Bol does, and find it funny.

I retract the "F y'all" comment, though it wasn't aimed at you, it wasn't called for.

All the best bboy!


yay! mousie came thru! (finally...) jk...

please dont retract ur statement. i absolutely adore the honesty in it. just not the inherent contradiction. i really strongly feel that until we get rid of the pc shit, we will not get to a solution for the things that keep us from being unified. and if not a solution, then and understanding we can operate off of to get shit done. thats why i shoot it like i do. it may not be easy to hear it like this sometimes. even i look at the screen and be, thats a lil ruff. but its real as crack kills.

and i aint no saint. aint tryin to paint that portrait. i got my shit too. but im in the dialogue to a better understanding. its important. for awl uh us.

thats why i'm glad u came thru!

prosperity always,


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